From my book Daily Prayer 2, a reminder of the need to put ourselves as best we can into the shoes of others, so that we can understand them better.
Read
Then Job answered: ‘How much longer do you intend to torture me, and shatter me through your words? You have blamed me ten times for my situation; don’t you feel any embarrassment at wronging me so? Even if you were right in saying I’ve gone astray somehow, that would be for me to sort out. So before you think yourself better than me and assume that the sorry circumstances I’ve fallen into are in some way my own doing, understand this: it is God who has brought me low and drawn me into his net.’ Job 19:1-6
Ponder
My wife had browsed in the shoe shop for what seemed like hours, but at length she shook her head and left, muttering in frustration, ‘There’s nothing here.’ She was wrong, of course, for there were lots of shoes, but none were suitable for her. We all have different tastes; some would walk into that shop and go away proudly clutching a purchase, quite happy to wear what others wouldn’t be seen dead in.
We may not want to share the same footwear literally but we do well, nonetheless, to put ourselves in other people’s shoes. If we could do that more we’d understand them far better and avoid so much of the intolerance that blights our world today. We’d be more ready to make allowances and less prone to pass judgement, conscious that most situations are more complex than they seem and typically involve shades of grey rather than black and white moral issues.
That’s what the friends and relations of Job had to learn. They were convinced that Job must have brought upon himself his countless misfortunes and sufferings, and they refused to countenance otherwise. We see similar attitudes expressed today: ‘the unemployed don’t want to work’, ‘asylum seekers are on the scrounge’, ‘single mothers are irresponsible’, and so forth – such ideas saying more about popular prejudice than reality. We jump to conclusions about people on the flimsiest of evidence, failing to look beneath the surface. If we could only learn to empathise with people’s situations and put ourselves as best we can into their shoes, what a difference it would make, to us and to all.
Ask yourself
Do you put yourselves into the shoes of others as much as you should? What mistakes have you made from failing to do so? What prejudices in your life do you allow to go unchallenged as a result?
Pray
Loving God, help me to put myself into the shoes of others, to look beyond my limited horizons and unconscious prejudices and to recognise the problems they face and the circumstances that shape them. Help me to identify as much as I can with their situations, seeking to understand and empathise rather than making snap judgements or allowing narrow preconceptions to dictate my attitudes. Just as you see the best in me rather than the worst, the good instead of the bad, give me the openness and generosity of spirit I need to do the same in all my dealings with others. Amen.
Remember
Then all his brothers and sisters, together with all his old friends and acquaintances, came to him and dined with him in his home. They expressed sympathy over everything God had put him through, and offered whatever comfort they could. Job 42:11a
Close
Teach me, Lord, to see things from other people’s point of view, as I would have them do with me. Amen.