way to approach them. It does so, though, not on the basis of some arbitrary judgement of my own, but exploring rather words of the Teacher (almost certainly, King Solomon) from the Old Testament. Then, and only then, do I reflect further on what these words may have to say to us today. This session considers a quality we don’t often talk about much today, but one that, properly understood, is a gift much to be sought after.
I saw a man full of his own importance, preening himself arrogantly, broadcasting his opinions for all to hear, sure of his own rightness.
I saw another, shy and retiring, cowed in a corner – awkward and embarrassed, studiously avoiding the eyes of all.
And my thoughts turned to humility: of how some need more of it and others need less.
So I said to the Teacher, ‘What does it mean to be humble? Is it a weakness or a strength?’
And the Teacher answered, ‘A proud heart leads to destruction, but humility earns true respect. When pride rears its head, embarrassment follows soon afterwards; those who are unassuming show true insight.’
Then I understood that humility is not just the absence of pride but the presence of something more: a balanced understanding of our strengths and weaknesses, a proper sense of who and what we are. For we all have both our good side and our bad, our fortes and our flaws, our beauty and our beast. Each has something to give to others and something to receive, something to teach and something to learn.
And I saw that humility means taking ourselves seriously yet being able to laugh at our foibles, standing by our convictions yet being open to those of others, exploring our potential yet recognising our limitations.
So I said to the Teacher, ‘Instruct me further on this.’
And the Teacher said, ‘Just as silver is refined in a crucible and gold in a furnace, so people are tested through being praised. If you have been so foolish as to exalt yourself, cover your mouth for shame.’
I understood then that there is no merit in thinking too much of ourselves . . . or too little; in puffing ourselves up or putting ourselves down; for neither false modesty nor vain posturing will make us any more or any less than we are.
I saw rather that humility means to hold our head up high, yet not to look down on others; to recognise our gifts yet never to trumpet them; to appreciate our worth but to appreciate that of others equally.
So then, my conclusion is this: whoever you are, you matter, but so do all who cross your path. Respect yourself as much as them, and them as much as yourself, and you will have got the balance right.